How I Found My Purpose in Life
Something that I think about a lot is my purpose in life. I think we all have these thoughts a lot, and I know I am not alone in the curiosities of what on earth I am doing here. For most of my life, I aligned my purpose with my career and though that was the only way to find fulfillment in my life.
I was always jealous of people who knew what they wanted to do before heading to college, that stayed on a path and found their career and seem to just sort of be smooth sailing through it all. I’m sure I have made a fairy tale of the realities of those people’s lives, but you get what I am saying.
I had a taste of that for a moment of my career, but found it hard to really figure out \what path to go down before I landed in radio. I am too curious of a person, with many interests and many hobbies. I like to learn new things but don’t feel the need to master them. That is both a strength and a weakness in my mind, but that’s something to sort out at a later time. Jack of all trades, master of none.
I’m like a cat, but with seemingly for the moment only one life (even though I hope/keep my fingers crossed) that I will get many lifetimes over to enjoy what the planet has to offer.
As I got older, I started to realized that I kind of always knew what was right for me, but spent a lot of time ignoring it for one reason or another. Fear, mostly, which I talked about it Episode 4 of this very podcast. Lately, I have been really leaning into what makes ME happy and not what society insists I do in order to live a full and worthy life.
Want to listen to the rest of this story instead of reading it? It’s on my podcast. Click here.
I know it’s cliche. I feel like everyone is talking about this lately and with that can come a bit of a “yeah, we get it” mentality, but I can’t continue sharing my stories if I don’t talk about how I really found my purpose, which to me is being honest about the things most people are too ashamed to talk about, and sharing that with a broad audience of people. I love taboo subjects, I love discussing the things that we are always told to keep to ourselves. I like to question the status quo and I like to challenge societal norms, especially when they are harmful to the general population.
I know that a lot of my being able to speak up and speak out is rooted in privilege, which I do not take for granted. But as a Jewish woman, I have plenty of hurdles to jump over in America. I think that’s what makes me understand the ways in which I am privileged.
But I realized that story telling and living my truth in the public eye is absolutely my purpose, and it’s taken me awhile to find it. So how did I do it?
First, I started to listen to my intuition, without letting the fear that I am making the “wrong” decision take over. I stopped ignoring my gut when it was clearly giving me the answer I was looking for. When other people were projecting their fears onto me, I stood strong in my trusting of my own knowledge of what was best for me and stayed on that path.
This is a really hard thing to do, because differentiating your fear and someone else is very confusing. It all feels the same in the mind and body, but you absolutely can stop down and sort it out. Basically, I just started to trust myself. At the end of the day, no one can REALLY decide what makes my heart flutter, what brings me true joy, what I am ashamed of or not, what feels good to me or not. That goes for you too. Nobody can tell you that. Only you know it. Only you feel when your heart beats faster because you are excited by something. Nobody else dictates that for you.
So that was one thing I did to help me connect and find my purpose in life.
Another thing I did was try a bunch of things. Like, a lot of things. As far as work goes, I’ve done everything from working on a food truck (for one shift. One shift and I quit. I learned REAL fast that that was NOT the gig for me), to working as a travel agent. From radio to record label to freelance writing for a phone sex company. True story. Great gig. Wish I still had it.
I started a clothing company and closed it a year later because I realized that fashion and clothing were not a passion of mine. I have spent the past two years figuring out what exactly makes me feel like I am utilizing my talents while combining my passion for small business and empowering women and I’ve found myself working with great clients who respect me. I’ve also discovered that my title and the company I work for does not define me and I don’t want to be one of those people working 80 hour work weeks for a flashy company that doesn’t care about my goals or dreams in life.
I am not ok with just being a number, being paid less than I am worth because I am constantly threatened that someone younger and faster is behind me. I thought I HAD to work in places like that, but it turns out with enough passion and drive (and ignoring fear) making money in other ways is 100% possible, and I am doing it right now. I won’t lie though, I have an amazing support system which allowed me to explore this for the last couple of years. Don’t just jump ship on your crappy job without a plan. Would hate to inspire anyone to do that.
The last thing I will share with you that truly helped me to start walking on a path that feels really fucking good and aligned was learning and practicing conscious living. I am an active participant in my own growth. I go to therapy to help me process events in life that would otherwise keep me weighted down. I have learned and utilize meditation, breathing and other ground practices to keep me from spiraling in situations that in the past would have sent me into a dark place.
Part of that has to do with me going to a doctor for my mental health, which I will share in an upcoming episode. But most of it has to do with me deciding that I was tired of ignoring all of these amazing messages my gut was always telling me. It’s scary, btw, but damn does it feel good when you finally start listening. We all get those messages. You know you do too. I can feel it, even without talking to you or knowing who it is that is listening right now.
We’ve just been taught for so long that there is a “right” and “wrong” way to do life but we are definitely waking up to the realization that that isn’t dictated by outside forces. The only “right and wrong” that exists is deep inside us every day.
I found my purpose by listening to myself. You can do that too. What are things that have always made you happy? For me, it’s art, its travel, its spending time with the people that are most important to me. It’s trying new things and making people laugh.
I like playing video games and going to the beach. Swimming in the ocean and being in the sand is something I’ve done since I was a teenager, and it brings me so much joy. It’s about deep conversations, it’s about sharing my stories and CONNECTING to other people while I am here. It’s about making people feel safe with me and being a dependable friend. I live for that shit. I want to know you. I want to hear your stories. I truly am interested in it all.
The current therapy I am doing is helping me hone that mind/body connection, giving my gut and instinct the power it deserves while taking some of that power away from my very strong mind. I know this is a never ending journey, and my passion and purpose will change as I go through the different seasons of my life and I really look forward to that shit.
So if you expect me to be the same Sasha you’ve always known and loved..well. Buckle up. Because it’s a wild ride over here and I’m not sorry. If we aren’t evolving, we aren’t living so you can expect me to find my final form when I’m dead.
If there’s one thing I can share on this podcast that is most important to me, it’s to encourage YOU to start listening to your gut. You are so much smarter and know so much more about what you should be doing here, but you likely aren’t listening. Or you hear it and someone is telling you differently. Or you know it but are too afraid to acknowledge it because society says its not normal or ok. I urge you to ignore THAT instead of ignoring yourself.